Working It Down........

11/13/12--Tuesday--Day 31--T-Minus 17 Days and Counting
Today was my first day back at work since I announced my cancer to my team and my boss last Monday.  I left Tuesday for the doctor's appointment, Wednesday was my mom's Hospice memorial and Thursday I was back in Mesa for lab work.  By Friday, I was still in Mesa and just wasn't where I needed to be mentally to go into work.  Yesterday it was back to Mesa for the radiologist appointment, so finally, after 7 days, I put my head back in the game and returned to work today.  I have to admit, it felt good to wake up with something on my mind besides the cancer.

My team is absolutely amazing!  Before I left last Monday, we brainstormed the major projects that needed to be completed or worked on so we didn't fall behind.  My team dug in and never missed a beat.  All of the projects progressed as scheduled.  They even completely cleaned and organized the warehouse and it looks amazing.  In reality, they admitted they were glad I wasn't there for that one because they could do it they way they wanted.  They did great.

Because it has been such a challenging year for me personally, I have missed more work since April than I've missed in 18.5 years when back in 1994 I was put to bed due to pregnancy complications with Brooklyn.  Thank you Carol, Bryan, Stephanie, Duane, Paul, and Galina.  You have been the best support ever.

Despite my wonderful co-workers, it's hard not to feel very guilty about missing so much work.  I looked at the calendar and realized I only have 8.5 work days left before the surgery.  Then, if I'm out for a week following surgery, I may only have about 13 work days before starting radiation.  Luckily, because of the type of work I do, I am hoping to be able to do some work during radiation, but here I go getting WAY ahead of myself again trying to plan and control something entirely out of my control, so I'll stop.

Despite my guilt about missing so much work, I love my job, and returning to it is part of what is keeping me sane.  It is another way of keeping the normalcy in my life.  There is just so much to do as I start working it down--T-minus 17 days and counting!