12/9/12--Sunday--Day 57--The Small Blessings
So these last few days have been a bit of a challenge. The ups and downs of the pathology report last Tuesday put me on edge anyway and knowing I was going to wait another week and a half for the tumor board before I knew anything began testing my patience. On Tuesday, my surgeon suggested I save a trip and come next Thursday for my post op appointment instead of this past Thursday. That way it would be after she presented my case to the tumor board and she would have more information. At the time, that seemed reasonable, but as the clock ticked on, I realized, I still didn't even have an appointment with an oncologist. I wanted to see Dr. Cianfrocca because she came highly recommended and treated Charlene's mother who was a personal friend of mine since I was a young girl. Each time I asked about when I would see an oncologist, I kept being told they would make an appointment for the day of my post-op appointment, but no one ever did. By the Monday after my surgery, no one had set up an appointment so I finally called myself. By then, the doctor had no openings until January 3rd, which I took. On Tuesday, while giving me the first incorrect report on the pathology findings, Melissa, the surgeon's assistant, said she saw some room where she might be able to get me in to see Cianfrocca on the 19th. I asked her how since on Monday they told me she was booked until January 3rd. Melissa said, "Well, that's because you were just a DCIS case. Now that you are an invasive case, they may find a way to move you up." While that made me feel better, it definitely made me feel worse.
Wednesday, I waited to hear from scheduling to confirm my Thursday appointment was moved to the following Thursday, and to see if my oncology appointment got moved to the 19th. No one called. By 3 o'clock, I decided to call the scheduler and check--no answer. I left a message. By 4:30, I left another message. No returned call. Thursday morning, I waited until 10 am, my original post op appointment time, and I called again. No answer so I left another message. By 11:00, I was completely frustrated. I called the main line of the Cancer Center and came a little unglued. I told them I was tired of not getting through to talk to anyone and not having my messages returned. I said if they couldn't be proactive on my part, I was considering looking for a different Cancer Center. I was transfered to a patient relations representative and after telling her of my frustrations, she put me on hold and Melissa came on the line. Melissa apologized for not getting in touch with me earlier that morning but she had everything arranged late Wednesday evening. I had an appointment to see the oncologist, Dr. Cianfrocca, at 4 on Monday and then I would see Byrum for my post op following that. Wow. I couldn't get in until January 3rd, then because I was an invasive case, I might get in the 19th, but now, I was going to get in Monday! Holy cow. Was I dying? It didn't matter. I finally felt a little bit settled. Melissa gave me her cell number and invited me to call or text if I had any other questions. And though I knew I wouldn't have all the answers until after the tumor board on Thursday, my appointment on Monday would at least I give me a doctor to whom I could ask all of my questions.
Friday I spent the morning working with insurance and trying to understand how all of these claims were going to be processed, why hospitals billed us before insurance had even paid, and when we should pay what. We had received the biopsy bill. It was $7,500. Because of my toe injury earlier in the year, there was some confusion as to whether I had reached my out-of-pocket costs or not. After meeting with Jenny, the local insurance representative, I started to feel a little more relief. She assured me she was going to help us through this entire process--God bless her--and to leave any worry about bills to her. What a great person to have in my corner.
By mid morning, I receive a call from my AFLAC representative, Jim. Jim, the AFLAC guy, has been coming to our insurance sign-up days for as long as I can remember. He's the last station you visit where you turn in all of your paper work. He's an older man whom I have always loved and been very attracted to his energy. Each year I would wait to see him instead of another open agent because I just loved talking to him. In fact, one year, he didn't show up. Worried about him, I found out he had fallen and sustained a major injury to his shoulder requiring surgery. I found him a duck card (AFLAC--duck--you get it), and wrote him a duck poem about getting better, and sent it to him. He was so moved the next year when he saw me that I had been so kind. He said he had never received anything like that. I was just glad he recovered and returned. Several years before that, about eight years ago, Jim started talking to me about adding a cancer policy. I told him that seemed silly since my regular health insurance paid my health costs, even if I got cancer. He explained how the cancer policy helped pay for all those other expenses not covered by insurance. I told him no one in my family has ever had cancer and politely thanked him but said no thanks. The next year, he talked again about the cancer policy and recommended I seriously consider adding it. Once again, I politely declined. The third year, he began again. He explained how important it could be and how helpful it could be. I don't know if I admired his persistance, or something just opened my mind, but Greg and I decided to add a cancer policy to our accident policy that year and we've been carrying it for the last five years. So when I received a call from Jim Friday morning, I almost broke out in tears, and so did he I think. He was in total shock. We both recalled how much he had to pushed to get me to take out that policy. I told him he is one of three angels who, because of their actions, I am in a better place now than I could be. I told him he should keep being persistent and no one should ever walk out of insurance sign up without getting a cancer policy. This policy is going to save us when it comes to traveling to Mesa for all of the treatments along with hundreds of dollars of other types of expenses that are beyond the basic health care. There is even a benefit to help with the cost of a wig!
I was glad when the weekend came as our friends from Phoenix, Paul and Diane, decided to come to Safford for a visit. It was nice to escape what the upcoming week was about to bring and just enjoy hanging out. They were a great distraction as we played board games, went to dinner, and talked about everything from pink elephants to raising kids to vacationing. Being a nurse, Diane was able to spend a little time explaining some of the details on the pathology report. I think the most scary part right now is the idea that the cancer has spread from being just a breast cancer to being a cancer that has entered my lymph system. That is probably my biggest concern and question for the oncologist tomorrow. Just what does that mean? Up until now, we have focused on this being breast cancer--the only curable cancer. Hmmm, where exactly are we now? I'm glad I'll be able to ask these questions in the next 24 hours and get a more clear picture of where we are heading.
So while this has been a very emotionally charged week, through all the frustration, all the scariness, and all the questions, it is all of the people who have cared and are actively fighting in my corner, even when it may seem like they aren't. I'm thankful for Melissa, Jenny, Jim and most of all, for all of the friends who have been so supportive through my ups and downs. And while we are all waiting on pins and needles for some answers to come tomorrow and Thursday, for now I'm just thankful for all of the small blessings I continue to receive.
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